Fab, Mad and Bad Addie

Wannabe Poet, bogus Prophet, wobbly Blob of Fat, cynical Kindred Spirit, angry Angel, Irony in Juxtaposition. Oh, and I'm IT illiterate too.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Bluffology

For some reason, I always get hit on by Indians. Don't get me wrong, I have no racial preference. I have long told all my friends that as long as ada otak and can spikking England, I'm cool with him. And whaddaya know, most of them who speak good English turn out to be Yindians. And I suspect that they might have a fetish for wobbly, generously-overflowing women too. Oh well, it's just a hunch.

I also realise that 3 out of 4 Indian men who hit on me will talk about the size of their members. And I have to go on record for this - 3 out of 4 who brag about it end up having smaller-than-medium sized members. I'm serious. I can vouch for the fact that Indian men DO NOT have bigger members by virtue of genetics. Sorry. Although there was one loser who did measure up... but that was all he had - size. He couldn't even keep it up. Poor me.

So there - this entry is dedicated to you (reckless name dropping starts... NOW) - Radah, Vijay, Syah and Kish. All losers, liars and lamers.



Disclaimer:
Ahem. NO, I didn't sleep with ALL of them!! Some of them just bragged too much.



4 Comments:

Blogger Vernon said...

er...HAHAHAHAHHA...

Did you draw those? MUHAHAHAHAHAH!

12:41 PM  
Blogger Leen AshBurn said...

You are so disturbing sometimes. Very correct. But disturbing.

2:41 PM  
Blogger Adeline Gypsy Heart said...

Yeah Verne - drew 'em powerpoint. Sorry I donch know how to use Illustrator or Indesign :((

Chi Chi - based on actual events you know!!!

4:54 PM  
Blogger Vernon said...

Here's something for your machas:

Sing to the tune of "I Will Survive"

At first I was afraid,
I was petrified,
When you said you had 10 inches
Lord I almost died,
But I'd spent oh so many yrs
just waiting for a man that long,
That I Grew strong,
And I knew that I could take you on. . .

But there you are,
Another lie,
I was ready for a big mac
and you've bought me a French fry,
I should have known that it was bullshit, Just a sad pathetic dream, Should have known there was no anaconda lurking in those jeans.

Go on now go,
Walk out the door,
Don't you promise me 10 inches
then turn up with only 4,
Weren't you a prat to think I wouldn't catch you out,
Don't you know we' re only joking when we say size doesn't count.


(Chorus)
I will survive,
I will survive,
Cos as long as I have batteries,
My sex life is gonna thrive,
I will always have good sex
with a handful of latex,
I will survive,
I will survive. . .hey . hey

It took all my self control
not to laugh out loud,
When I saw your little weiner
standing tall and proud,
But to hell with all your ego's
and to hell with all your Needs,
Now I'm saving all my lovin
for a cordless multispeed,

Go on now go,
Just Make a dash,
Last time I saw a prick that small was watching Gladstone run nude hash, I should have asked for confirmation, Should have asked for referees, Then I wouldn't have you waving that wee winky thing at me.

Go on now go,
Just hit the track,
Don't you bring me home no tiddlers,
Cos I'll always throw them back,
The only thing that I could do with a prick as small as yours,
Is to stick it with a tooth pick
Dip it in tomato sauce.

(Chorus)
I will survive,
I will survive,
Cos as long as I have batteries,
My sex life is gonna thrive,
I will always have good sex
with a handful of latex,
I will survive,
I will survive. . .hey . hey

Go on now go,
Get out of my sight,
I'm going back to my appliance,
Cos I know it's length is right,
And if I ever see your tiny tockley at my door, You'll be counting up your inches as you pick them off the floor. Go on now Go!

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3:12 PM  

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